by

Breaking Myself


“The saddest thing in life is wasted talent.”

My best friend from childhood ended up in a 9-5 job barely making ends meet. His sister didn’t even finish college. One of guys we all feared but loved to play soccer with ended up paying more visits to the police section than school. Another one is now a drug addict.

I’ve seen people wasting their talent my whole life. Every year I get new examples.

What I’m afraid most of is that one year that example will be me.

Back in 2013, I left Romania in order to pursue bigger opportunities. I was an 18 years old kid who has been told for years that he’s talented. I was ready to capitalize on it.

During the next 3 years I got from not being able to get job interviews to being offered a managing position (twice), from wanting to drop out of college to nailing my thesis project, from lows in which I was feeling the worst to highs in which I was told I was one of the best.

Fast forward in 2016, I thought I was too comfortable with what I had and it was time to make a switch.

Six months passed by and for the first time I am really doubting if I made a good decision.

Why?

Because I feel it is limiting my potential. Big time.

But what is actually my potential and where should I focus in order to fructify it the most?

Well.. . every time I think about it I end up asking the question that I always hated: “what the hell do I want to do with my life?”.

The more I talk with people smarter than me, the more confused I get.

My mentor said stop thinking so much and just focus on one thing.

Somebody said go where the money is.

Somebody else said he cannot give me the answers, but he can guide me in order to ask the right questions.

I now have three job offers I can choose from and I have no clue which one would help me achieve the most I can.

None is better than the other. They are all good, but very different.

My goal is to learn as much as possible and to work with as many talented people as possible.

So…?

Theoretically, all three offer it.

Practically, all companies are trying to sell you their job.

So…?

I have no damn idea.

I decide to go outside and get all of this out of my head.

A walk helps you feel better and see things clearer, right?

Well… not if at the end of it you and up asking: “what if I am not really that talented?”.

People cannot help me in getting from A to B.

They can show me the way they see things, but it is up to me take action.

Two things are certain:

  1. Not doing what I have to do will make me feel worse than doing it and failing at it.
  2. After I choose something, I have to develop ruthless focus and give it everything I can.

To be continued…

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